Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Segway to not look good

Fashion enemy of the day: SEGWAYS! Maybe I’m just speaking from a bitter segway-virgin standpoint, but come on... can they really be that fun? I pass people on segways when I’m on FOOT. Okay, this take on a segway looks pretty fun, and the guy doesn’t look bad either. James Dean transported through time! It’s called an Uno.

But this is just a cool anomaly of the segway phenomenon. I defy an average person on an average segway to look cool. Maybe it has something to do with the big bright helmets and that awkward looking erect posture that is needed to keep balance, but in my opinion, segways are simply not conducive to dignity.

First of all, we live in a time of rising obesity. It’s one thing to be disabled and have the opportunity to keep up while touring a city, but couldn’t the rest of us use the cardiovascular activity of actually walking? And I can’t see how traveling around with a tour guide looking like a gaggle of over-sized ducklings is a good way to experience a new city. The natives are all looking at you like a fool, and in a place like Atlanta, you might as well stamp TOURIST on your forehead and try to get along without being solicited for change. Plus, how are you supposed to do the most important and necessary thing when visiting a new city, which everyone knows is shopping!? Can you lock a segway on a bike rack or something?

This is about the only image of a segway that can appeal to me.

Unless you’re a fabulous little dutch lady in a quaint little Sunday dress, maybe you should leave the segway in the garage and just use your feet.

(Image stolen from http://designcorner.blinkr.net/tag/Object?page=51)
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